vaticinate (verb) – to tell of or describe beforehand
It’s that time of year when the Miami Dolphins enter their own personal postseason: one where no games are played and everyone just sits around brooding until about a month out from the draft.
That also means it’s the time of year to look back and very likely laugh at the predictions made by yours truly before the season began.
The Dolphins’ defense will improve in at least two major categories
Verdict: True!
Let’s just jump right to the front of the success train.
Miami’s defensive rank comparison between 2023 | 2024 is as follows:
Total Defense – 10th | 10th
Passing Yards Allowed – 15th | 9th
Rushing Yards Allowed – 7th | 9th
Scoring Defense – 22nd | 10th
Red Zone Defense – 28th | 4th
3rd Down Defense – 20th | 7th
By my high level mathematics, that’s improvement in 4 major categories.
That’s actually pretty remarkable. Anthony Weaver did a solid job in the face of both injuries and some underwhelming talent, so hopefully he stays a Fin to keep that ol’ success train of ours (his and mine, cuz we’re choo choo friends) rolling.
Miami will make the playoffs for a third time under Mike McDaniel
Verdict: False!
I mean.
This seemed like a good idea at the time and they almost got there. If Tua could have stayed healthy or the weather had been a little nicer or they could have beaten some bad teams or they could have scored more points than their opponents a few more times, they would have made it in and made me right.
As it stands, they’re on the outside looking in, but poised to run it back with the same gang next year. So I’ll probably just predict they miss the postseason next time, which should basically guarantee they get back in.
The Fins will repeat as the league’s top offense
Verdict: False!
This fell off the hardest. Miami dropped from #1 to #22 and they did so on the back of some bizarre playcalling, poor performances, injuries galore, and an overall sense of discombobulation all year long. The Greatest Show on Surf became a painful discount matinee that no one wanted to see and definitely no one wanted to pay for.
Maybe they’ll turn it around next year. Or maybe my thetans are just misaligned.
Tyreek Hill will break 2,000 yards receiving
Verdict: False!
If you’re gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough and this one looks dumb now.
Hill finished 2024 with 959 receiving yards, barely half of the 1,799 he put up in 2023. As a part of the aforementioned underperforming Fins’ offense, Hill struggled to stand out. He didn’t burn defenses deep as he had a penchant for doing in Mike McDaniel’s previous offense and the corrections never came.
It’s currently unclear if he’ll return to the Dolphins for 2025, but if not, I’ll blame myself for his final season being such a relative disappointment.
Big Bold Prediction: Chop Robinson will have more sacks than Bradley Chubb
Verdict: True!
It doesn’t count for two, but it seems like I should change my own rules just to feel better.
My Big Bold Prediction came true mostly because Bradley Chubb never came back from his prior season ending injury and, thus, recorded 0 sacks.
On the other much more positive hand, rookie Chop Robinson picked up 6 sacks in his first season and appeared to find his groove as a pass rush specialist. He still has plenty of work to do to round out his game and be an every down defender, but the early returns look good and getting a big swing right for once makes them that much better.
Final Verdict
2/5
Every day we stray a little further from the light. Except for me, who gets .5 more of these correct each year.
2029: I’m coming for you.
Did the 2024 Dolphins live up to your expectations? What are your predictions for the 2025 Dolphins? How about the 3072 Dolphins? Go on a vision quest in the comments below.